I hope you're happy.

And I wanted to tell him that the pleasure for me wasn’t planning or doing or leaving; the pleasure was in seeing our strings cross and separate and then come back together.

But you know what is devastating? Living a life you don’t really want because you never had the guts to live your truth. What I mean by “your truth” is what you know to be what you most want to do. The person or people you most want to love. The things that cut you open and ignite your nerves and can send you over the edge but you keep going back because you know, despite everything, that this is what’s meant for you. If nothing else, the reason to do it is this: the truth inside you will win out eventually. Or it will drive you mad. Your truth isn’t a passing thought or feeling that will just dissipate one day. You won’t get over what’s really meant for you. You will only ever become more and more aware that you’re denying yourself the greatest joy in fear of the possibly greatest disappointment. I can’t believe I’m throwing this quote in here, but I can’t think of anything that sums it up better: “the brave may not live forever, but the cautious don’t live at all.

You don’t know anyone at the party, so you don’t want to go. You don’t like cottage cheese, so you haven’t eaten it in years. This is your choice, of course, but don’t kid yourself: it’s also the flinch.

Your personality is not set in stone. You may think a morning coffee is the most enjoyable thing in the world, but it’s really just a habit. Thirty days without it, and you would be fine. You think you have a soul mate, but in fact you could have had any number of spouses. You would have evolved differently, but been just as happy.

You can change what you want about yourself at any time. You see yourself as someone who can’t write or play an instrument, who gives in to temptation or makes bad decisions, but that’s really not you. It’s not ingrained. It’s not your personality. Your personality is something else, something deeper than just preferences, and these details on the surface, you can change anytime you like.

If it is useful to do so, you must abandon your identity and start again. Sometimes, it’s the only way.

Set fire to your old self. It’s not needed here. It’s too busy shopping, gossiping about others, and watching days go by and asking why you haven’t gotten as far as you’d like. This old self will die and be forgotten by all but family, and replaced by someone who makes a difference.

Your new self is not like that. Your new self is the Great Chicago Fire—overwhelming, overpowering, and destroying everything that isn’t necessary.

Do not chase people. Be you and do your own thing and work hard. The right people who belong in your life will come to you, and stay.